Can’t Shake Your Recurring Dreams? — What They Mean and Why You Have Them

It happened again.

You had yet ANOTHER #!@&! dream about your ex. 

2 weeks ago, he popped up in your dream sashaying up to your door, expensive wine and your favorite dinner in hand, begging you to take him back — blubbering on and on about how he can’t live without you. 

Last night, you bumped into him at the farmer’s market. But this one turned into a twisted nightmare. He was with a sickenly, beautiful woman sporting a rock of an engagement ring. He was laughing happily with her — wait, or was he laughing AT you??

Wait. What?…

You’re smacked with reality when you wake up because, IRL, your ex broke up with you outta nowhere. He’s already seeing someone new, so it wasn’t that he didn’t want a relationship. 

He just didn’t want you — or at least that’s the story you’re telling yourself. 

It sucks, it hurts, and you just wanna crawl into the deepest, darkest hole and be done with it.

Hang on a minute and take a deep breath — you’re not crazy or a dream stalker. 

Those recurring dreams are your mind’s way of telling you there’s more work to do before you can wash your hands of him. 

So, let’s get into why you have recurring dreams and how you can get ‘em gone by learning more about them.

  • What Is A Recurring Dream?

  • Why Do Recurring Dreams Happen & Are They Significant?

  • 12 Common Themes of Recurring Dreams

  • What Can You Learn From Your Recurring Dreams?

  • How Do You Stop Recurring Dreams?

WHAT IS A RECURRING DREAM?

A recurring dream is a dream repeated over a period of time — it could be occasionally, over several years, or even a lifetime.

Do you have a recurring dream? Or dreams? You’ve got plenty of company. Recurring dreams occur in 60% to 75% of adults, and FYI, more often in women than men. 

The majority, but not all, of recurring dreams have a negative feel, lending themselves to emotions like fear, sadness, anger, and guilt. However, some recurring dreams can be positive, even euphoric, like finding hidden treasures under your house or flying over the ocean at sunset.

Significant events can undoubtedly change the way you sleep and can profoundly affect your dreams or cause recurring dreams. 

Calling the Covid-19 Pandemic “significant” could possibly go down as the understatement of the century — it had a huge mental impact on us all. 

A 2020 crowdsourcing survey conducted during the 6th week of the lockdown gathered dream content from hundreds of participants over the period of a week.

Drumroll, please. In a nutshell, here are the results:

  • 28.6% woke up more frequently during the night, and 26% had more nightmares than before the pandemic.

  • Out of 33 dream “clusters”, 20 fell into the “Bad Dream” category —  and 55% of those dreams were pandemic specific (Getting Covid, disregard for social distancing, or the elderly in trouble).

WHY DO RECURRING DREAMS HAPPEN & ARE THEY SIGNIFICANT?

Dream science concerning recurring dreams indicates they may reflect unresolved conflict, unmet needs, or areas of frustration in the dreamer’s waking life.

A dream’s purpose is to point you inward towards what unchecked emotion or unresolved issue needs your attention. Sticking to this logic, your recurring dream’s purpose is to keep pointing to the core issue because you’re not addressing it.

So, yeah, they’re mighty significant.

A recurring dream carries a recurring message (from your subconscious mind) that you aren’t willing to hear and deal with. Your brain is repeatedly waving a flag, desperately trying to get your attention!

The only surefire way to continue having your recurring dream is to keep ignoring those messages. But if you’d rather get rid of or change your recurring dreams, you need to treat them as a top-priority, personalized message. 

12 COMMON THEMES OF RECURRING DREAMS 

Although your detailed dream content is specific to you and your life, there are some common themes among people of varied origins, cultures, and even different time periods.

Some of the most commonly reported themes are:    

  1.  Flying

  2.  Falling

  3.  Being chased or attacked

  4.  Being naked

  5.  Getting stuck or trapped somewhere

  6.  Going back to school

  7.  Losing your teeth

  8.  Losing your ability to speak

  9.  Missing a test

  10.  Showing up late for the 1st day or momentous occasion

  11.  Moving in slow motion or being unable to run

  12.  Crashing or losing control of a vehicle

In a series of studies by Calvin Kai-Ching Yu of Hong Kong Shue Yan University, 44.8% of participants said their dreams had the same theme either frequently or very frequently.

Your recurring dreams may not be exactly the same every time. For example, you might regularly dream about forgetting something super important, like an exam, your child, or how to run. 

The theme of “forgetting something important” is the same even though the details change — the dream theme is what you need to pay attention to.

WHAT CAN YOU LEARN FROM YOUR RECURRING DREAMS? 

You can learn a heap about yourself by analyzing your recurring dreams

If your dream isn’t based on a past trauma (serving as a help hotline for your unresolved emotions), think of it as a sort of movie your mind made (‘cause it did!) that you’re now premiering in the movie theater or, more relevant but less fanfare(ish), streaming online. 

What would you title your dream if you had to communicate the whole story in only 3-5 words like a movie title? 

Seriously. Do it now, just your gut reaction.

We’ll wait…

Let’s run through some examples to get your title ideas flowing:

  • Let’s say in your dream you were being chased by your ancient 1st-grade teacher ‘cause you did something sooo bad, even YOU are ashamed of it. You might title this one, “Payback’s A Teach!”

  • Do you have a recurring dream that brings up painful emotions? How about “The Hurt Locker?”

  • Let’s title the ouchy dream about your ex we started with — how about “Battlefield of Loneliness”?

Now that you’ve got your title, ask yourself these 2 questions:

  1. What’s the greater symbol this title alludes to?  

  2. When this dream resurfaces, what’s going on in your life that feels like “The Hurt Locker”? 

Your recurring dream will show up at a specific time. For example, a particular time of year or a season of life.

As you ask yourself these questions, record your answers in a dream journal — that’ll help you keep track and make sense of your thoughts and feelings around your recurring dream.

Keep in mind, all dreams are about symbolism. Therefore, it’s essential to focus on the symbolism of your dream to capture the true meaning so you can apply it to your life.

Say you have a recurring dream about being chased. 

Sometimes it’s a Tiger shark, sometimes a terrifyingly fast 500 lb. lion. Other times it’s a gangly, tall, dark figure wearing a top hat. 

Lean in close for this — your dream is probably not about “who” or “what” is chasing you but about the someone or something in your life that you perceive as dangerous in some way that you can’t get away from.

To really get the symbolism, you’ll have to acknowledge how the dream makes you feel and what in your life makes you feel the same way.  

❔ Not sure how to do that on your own? The Wakefully App is a dream come true (pun intended) to guide you in digging deeper to find the true meaning of your dreams.

HOW DO YOU STOP RECURRING DREAMS? 

Now that you’ve grasped why you might be having a recurring dream, wanna know how to kick it to the curb?

Well, let’s address the elephant in the room or what’s under the elephant’s skin — not in a gross way. 

Here’s a tip, follow the KISS (Keep It Simple Silly) concept. 

1. Acknowledge — Get real with yourself here. Before you can resolve tough feelings you’ve got to acknowledge what issues are present that you need to work through. How does your dream make you feel? While this isn’t always easy or pleasant, it’s crucial you learn to sit with the emotion. For example, does that recurring dream about bumping into your ex with his new wife make you feel so rejected you’re literally “swallowed up by the earth”? Remember, feelings are neither right nor wrong — give yourself permission to feel however you feel. 

Acknowledging how you feel is the 1st step in squashing your recurring dream because you’re no longer ignoring or stuffing your emotions associated with this dream. You’re telling your subconscious “I’m the captain now!” 

2. Address — After you acknowledge how your recurring dream makes you feel, you have to address how the dream symbolism and your emotions apply to your life. Addressing the true meaning of your recurring dream is essential in making those dreams eventually stop. 

Once you address what’s going on in your life and make the necessary changes, your subconscious mind doesn’t need to keep bringing it up in your dreams. 

“...researchers have shown that the occurrence of recurrent dreams during adulthood is associated with stressors and lowered levels of psychological well-being and that the elimination of a previously recurrent dream is correlated with improved well-being. Thus, changes from recurrent to progressive dream patterns may be important indicators of how well people are adapting to life circumstances.” — Antonio Zadra, professor at the University of Montreal and researcher at the Center for Advanced Research in Sleep Medicine.

3. Change — This is the powerful, life-altering step/benefit that comes from dream therapy. Acknowledging and addressing dream after dream contributes to your overall personal growth, and personal growth leads to change. As you begin to recognize your thought patterns and intentionally eliminate the unhelpful or destructive ones (negative mindset), you’ll reap the rewards of positive change in your life.

Changing your negative thoughts directly and positively affects your MINDset and the stories your mind spins out for you day after day and night after night. 

You’re so worth doing the work to change your thoughts and your life. 

A RECURRING DREAM IS A MESSAGE ON REPEAT  

A recurring dream is a message from your subconscious that plays on repeat because you aren’t getting or accepting the message. 

Plain and simple. 

Your recurring dream meanings hold the key to unlocking and resolving the stuff you’ve got packed way down that’s probably holding you back in life.

So don’t be afraid to acknowledge and address those recurring dreams. You’ll take back your power by making much-needed life changes, and your recurring dreams should eventually stop.

Wakefully can serve as your dream coach to help you get to the bottom of your recurring dream meaning and unleash your true potential. 

Want a simple way to get to the 🤍 heart 🤍 of your recurring dream meanings? Download our A.I. guided dream analysis app using the button below.

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7 Common Dream Types – What Your Dreams (Really) Mean To Y.O.U

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Holiday Dreams Or Holiday Nightmares? — Why You're Having Weird Dreams